Purge the I4’s from your writing: Inane, Irritating Ironic Instructions

Relax.

Take it easy.

Be creative.

Do your own research.

I’ve noticed phrases like these creeping into writing that I edit. I call them I4’s: inane, irritating ironic instructions. They turn how-to advice from specific to infuriating. Stop writing this way, please.

What is an I4?

An I4 is useless, vague advice included in a set of directions on how to accomplish something, such as how to improve your search engine optimization or how to manage a small department. The 4 I’s define it:

• Inane, because the instruction carries no actual information (Does “Be smart about how you plan things” tell you anything useful?).
• Irritating, because the lack of specificity leaves the reader annoyed and unsure.
• Ironic, because the instruction often has the opposite of the desired affect (Does “Calm down,” make you want be calm? Does “Don’t worry” free you from worry?)
• Instruction, because such tips are always written in the form of a command.

The fifth I, insight, is missing because there is rarely any insight in such advice. Some examples include:

• Be yourself. (Who else could I be?)
• Let it go. (If you could just do this, no one would ever pay a therapist.)
• Stop overthinking. (I’m overthinking right now about how to stop overthinking things.)
• Choose happiness. (Sure — because nothing can go wrong, can it?)
• Do your own research. (In other words, anything I find on the internet is okay to believe?)

Why I4s creep into writing

I4s make readers crazy. But writers keep writing them. Why?

Because the writers don’t really know what to say.

If I wrote advice on how to do gardening, it would be full of I4s like “Don’t overwater” and “Invest in hardy plants” — because I don’t actually know anything about gardening. I4s are easy to write if you’re ignorant, but useless to readers.

They’re especially common when writers need to stray out of their comfort zone. If I’m writing about book publishing, I might know all about working with traditional publishers but little about self-publishing. So my advice about working with publishers would be full of useful, specific, confident instructions, while my advice about self-publishing might verge into I4s like “Only work with trustworthy suppliers.”

How to fix I4s

Here’s how to purge I4’s from your writing:

1. Look for them. You’ll spot them if you’re looking carefully. Ask yourself, for each piece of how-to advice, “Could someone actually follow the steps I’ve outlined?” If they’re too vague to follow, you’ve got an I4.
2. Be especially sensitive when writing outside your comfort zone. If you don’t really know what you mean, your writing is going to reflect that.
3. Research and write actual concrete answers. You could find that out by interviewing experts who know what they’re talking about, or finding authoritative sources that fit with the rest of your advice. Quoting others doesn’t undermine your authority, it makes you more credible.

Now that you know about I4s, you can make sure they don’t creep into your writing.

Just relax. You’ve got this. You’ll be fine.

(Sorry. Couldn’t resist.)