I’ll help you if you’re a mensch

A mensch (from the Yiddish, rhymes with wrench) is a person of high integrity; a serious, dependable person. While it originated as a gendered term, it’s gone beyond that. There are plenty of women who are mensches and plenty of men who are not.

If you are a mensch, and you ask for my help, I will help you. If you are not, I will not.

If you’re working on a book of the kind I help with — non-fiction trends, self-help, idea, and thought leadership books — I’ll probably spend time talking to you. I like to hear what people are working on.

Before I do, I’ll check out your LinkedIn and your website. (It’s the 21st Century equivalent of a dog sniffing another dog’s butt.) I don’t care how old you are or if you worked for a prestigious company. But I can usually tell if you’re a mensch. I look at your degree. I look at your photo (you do have one, I hope). I look at what you’ve written. It doesn’t take long to see if you’re behaving like a serious person.

If I’ve vetted you and you’re worth working with, I’ll send you to my trusted contacts. Hybrid publishers. Self-publishing services. Editors. Designers. Book publicists. Whatever you need. They’re all mensches, too.

But if you’re not serious, if you’re selling something, if your LinkedIn or your site are full of random claptrap, self-promotional chest-beating, and exaggerated “facts,” you’re dead to me. No way am I sending you to my trusted mensches.

It’s not just me. All of us mensches behave like this. We vet you based on how you appear online. We help you if you appear serious and ignore you if you don’t.

What this means for you

Get your house in order.

Make sure your LinkedIn looks professional.

Post something interesting from time to time. Post things that help people and spread knowledge.

Create a website, even if it’s minimal.

And when you reach out, what matters is not what quid pro quo you’re offering, how pathetically you’re pleading, or how puffed-up your qualifications appear.

What matters is if you look like a mensch engaged in serious work to advance the knowledge of the world.

If you’re not, ask yourself what the heck you’re even doing. Try to do better. Stand up straight, polish up your LinkedIn, and act like a mensch for God’s sake.