How to ensure you’ll get the stupidest possible speakers at your event

I recently received this email (some words redacted):

Hey Josh, I hope you’re doing well!

About this time last year, we started to put together our very first [redacted] Summit, and we knew when 200 experts and speakers responded to our call to participate, we had something special.

That said, it still blew our expectations out of the water!

Over 22,000 people attended the event, we got tons of glowing feedback, and we paid out thousands of dollars in commission to our partners.

So, as you can probably guess, we can’t wait to bring back the [redacted] Summit 2.0 in February 2025 and it’s really coming together but we still have a few spots open in the topical panel discussions.

We’re aiming for 30,000+ attendees this time around, and generating tons opportunities for you to benefit from getting in front of this highly-targeted audience.

Are you interested in participating in a panel discussion at the [redacted] Summit in 2025?

Thanks,

[Name redacted], CEO / Co-Founder

Notice anything missing?

Here’s what I was looking for that wasn’t there:

• A link to the event site.
• A date.
• A location.
• Any indication of whether the event is virtual or in-person
• Any indication that the sender knows who I am, other than my name

The topic of the event interests me. But the lack of any information tells me that the sender is a spammer or an idiot.

Googling the event name gets me nothing; the name isn’t unique. But Googling the sender’s name reveals that this is a virtual event. If you’re trolling for potential speakers in January for an event in February, that’s pretty desperate.

Low-quality all around

Any speakers responding to a shoddy message like this will be the lowest possible quality.

I looked at the speakers. I don’t know any of them. If I did, I’d warn them that they’ve hooked up with spammer.

Anyone attending an event like this is going to get a pretty random experience.

Getting any information about this event, including the date, requires you to submit your email address and phone number.

Luckily, there is a frequently-asked questions section way at the bottom of the site. Unfortunately, answers to the questions “What is the date?” and “Will participating in this hurt my reputation?” aren’t there.

If 30,000 people really will attend an event like this, that says a lot about the state of the world.

I love quality events, including virtual ones. If you’re doing one, don’t behave like this, okay?