How to create productive engagement between freelancer and client

When freelancers get together, they complain about clients. “You won’t believe what she’s making me do.” “He thinks he has the right to spell words any way he wants.” “They’re violating all the rules of design and logic.”

When clients get together, they complain, too. “Everything has a price tag.” “He didn’t listen to me and ignored what I asked for.” “She says it’s done, but it’s not the way I wanted it to be.”

These are not resolvable conflicts. There is always going to be disagreement. And that is good. Quality work arises out of productive engagement between subject matter experts — clients — and content and process experts — freelancers.

So what does that productive engagement sound like?

First off, productive engagement requires dialogue. That’s a lot less likely to happen over email or in Slack. It’s a lot more likely to happen because the client and the freelancer are having an actual conversation by phone or videoconference.

When I’ve participated in these productive conversations, they tend to sound like this:

Client: I’ve reviewed your work and I find it excellent. However, I’d like to take it in this direction. [Describes an alternate way to do things.]

Freelancer: I hear you and hear what you’d like to do. Can you tell me why you want to do that?

C: [Provides reasons why they think a particular choice will work best.]

F: I understand that you’re trying to accomplish [restates reasons in own words]. But I’m concerned that your alternative won’t work well. Here are some reasons why people don’t generally do what you’ve asked, and how it works at cross-purposes to your objectives. On the other hand, I think based on what you said that your core goal is [describes goal in short, pithy terms]. Is that what you meant? If we could accomplish that some other way, would that work?

C: [Elaborates on F’s restatement of goal, describes what they are looking to accomplish in more fundamental terms.]

F: Ah, that makes sense. Suppose we tried to accomplish that by doing this? [Describes some alternatives that address C’s needs.]

C: I don’t like [some alternatives] but [other alternative] is an interesting idea. Could we tweak that by [elaborates on suggested alternative].

F: Sure, how about [further elaborates on alternative, based on experience].

C: Yes, let’s try that. Let me know when I can get a look at that and comment on it.

That may seem like a fantasy. But it happens all the time in productive relationships. Let’s dissect some elements of that dialogue to better understand it.

• The client, being the one paying the bills, deserves respect. The freelancer must listen to them carefully.
• The freelancer, being the expert in their own content format, also deserves respect. The client must agree that the freelancer’s expert opinion is worthy of consideration.
• Both focus on objectives — what the deliverable is supposed to accomplish — rather than positions, such as “It has to be x” or “It can never be y.”
• There is a commitment to work together to accomplish the objective.
• Both participants make suggestions. Both participants reflect on what those suggestions might accomplish, and whether there is another way to accomplish that.
• There is mutual respect. Nobody is mean, nasty, or defensive. No one lies or manipulates or goes behind anyone’s back.
• Both give reasons why they want (or resist) the recommended change. Those reasons are based in shared assumptions such as the goals of the project, the impression it will make, the cost, and the schedule.
• The agreement is provisional, until it’s implemented and everyone can see if it works.

I tend to like my clients, and they tend to like me. I also tend to respect my clients and they respect me. With this as context, we can usually get to agreement. And we can often come to a result that is better than either of us originally conceived, because this productive engagement surfaces new ideas.

This type of relationship demands skilled and experienced freelancers and clients who know their needs and content well. I try to be the skilled and experienced freelancer and to make sure the clients are the type of people I want to work with.

My track record in almost ten years of this and many dozens of jobs large and small, from ghostwritten books to corporate tag lines, is overwhelmingly successful. In all those projects, the total number of failures was two: I fired a client partway through exactly once, and I quit another project at the very beginning. Everything else went as planned. Nobody has ever fired me.

(Sometimes the clients lose steam and give up on the whole project, but that’s a completely different issue, one that doesn’t tend to have anything to do with me.)

I’ve either been very lucky or very good. You decide.

What this means for you as a freelancer

Know your stuff.

Listen.

Justify your opinions.

Don’t get stuck on only one way of doing things. Resourcefulness and flexibility in the face of conflict are great qualities.

Pick clients wisely.

What this means for you as a person who hires freelancers

Know your topic.

Listen.

Justify your opinions.

Don’t get stuck on only one way of doing things. Resourcefulness and flexibility in the face of conflict are great qualities.

Pick freelancers wisely.

Hmm. It’s funny how those things go both ways . . .